I hate how much I love it

So I'm undergoing some inner turmoil right now, over something very very serious. I was debating on whether or not I should share this with my readers, since it's a bit more of a personal issue, but I decided that it wouldn't be fair to you or myself to keep on lying and withholding such important information about who I am and what I do.

It's just that what I'm about to tell you pretty goes against my very nature--it has the potential to disrupt my whole identity as I know it. I've tried to supress it, ignore it, dismiss it from my life (get thee hence!), and chase it back to the place from whence it came. I've tried surrounding myself with things that won't remind me of it so much, but I'm having a hard time though. The internet makes it so available, it's just so easy to access. It's really disturbing how much it's changed my life. But I can't seem to get away from it--there's something just so addicting, exciting, alluring, mezmerizing, euphoric, and gratifying that I've given up on trying to pretend any longer. Some of you might cry at the news. All I can say, "I'm still who I am...this doesn't change anything". Please love me for me, and not for what I'm about to tell you. It pains me to write this even now, but it's the right thing to do.

Josh Turner...

Country Singer...(cringe)

Twangy Country Singer...

I mean SUUUUPER twangy...

NASHVILLE twangy (shudder)

With deep bass voice...

Hit Single...

"Would You Go With Me?"...(deep breath)

Love it. (gasp)

Seriously...L-O-V-E

Sing it all the time.

Shower.

Class.

Computer Lab.

Bus.

Grocery Store.

Know all the lyrics.

And even the twang.

Love the twang.

Find bass voice sexy.

A little obsessed.

Heart it.

Can't get enough.

We're talking 8 times a day for the last month.

(that's a lot of twang)

I'm hopeless.

Ugh.